Less (meat) is more

Japanese scientists have recently synthesized meat from human feces.

Say what?

Let me repeat that for you: Japanese scientists from the Okayama Laboratory have recently successfully created artificial meat from sewage mud containing human feces. And although this might open up some interesting possibilities for replying the waitress at your favourite burger joint,

- "How did you like your burger Sir?"

- "Perfect, it tasted like shit!",

or talking yourself out of a stinky embarrassing situations,

- "Did someone just fart over here?"

- "Errr..., no, I just opened my lunchbox!",

I am not really sure I can follow the motivation behind this. Having to apply for research grants myself every once in a while, I really would have loved to see the commission treating this team's proposal. A fourteen-page file, dumped onto a big, black desk, ready to compete with applications from people eager to investigate whatever it is about whales that requires you to catch at least 200 mammals: 'Poop burgers: can they solve the hunger problem?'.

Somehow, this whole idea of eating my own excrements - albeit shaped like a steak - makes me think of Escher's waterfall. No matter where you start, you eventually end up in the same place but still you feel like there's something wrong with the perspective - right?

It's only fair to say that Professor Ikeda and his team of researchers understand that 'there are some psychological barriers to be surmounted knowing your food is made from human waste'. When it comes to world class understatements, I believe this one can actually compete with 'Hugh Hefner is not a virgin anymore'. However - and I would like to get an amen for optimism, they hope 'people will be able to overlook that ugly detail in favor of perks like environmental responsibility, cost and the fact that the resulting meat will have fewer calories'.

How about surmounting the barrier that your food spent its life behind barriers, gnawing the days away, oblivious of that thing outside we tend to call 'the Earth'? How about taking up our environmental responsibility, not eating meat, adopting a vegetarian life-style? Even Professor Ikeda has to support this idea, because I suppose I'm not the only vegetarian who noticed the dramatic influence of a animal-friendly diet on the Bowel Factory and Co.

Or how less meat may equal more meat...